Man Of The Internet

  Hearing somebody else’s phone call is irritating enough let alone when they have their pissing phone on loudspeaker for the whole world to hear. I have had two memorable moments when I have wanted to grab their mobile phone and yeet it off in to the distance without a single moment of resentment, thinking about this in hindsight it would have been a public service. These two incidents in question happened once while at work and once while traveling somewhere on the train. Back where I was working in the office there was one manager who travel between two sites and gained the nickname of “Mr Big-Man” between myself and my fellow colleagues. He just had to be in contact with the opposite office at all times because heaven forbid that something happened while he was not there. Every time he came in and sat at the “hot swap desk”, he would almost like clockwork start talking unnecessarily loudly on his phone about some random bullshit. This normally had the rest of the office fin...

OMFG THERE IS A FUEL SHORTAGE… well no but also yes, let me explain! Just like back at the start of the pandemic here in the UK, the government said “no need to worry there is enough food to go around, keep on as normal” and the news media went on to say “there could be a shortage in some things” followed by some supermarkets saying “we are reducing our range on some items so everybody can get what they need”. This resulted in everybody going bat shit crazy buying up all the loo roll and tins of beans to horde away in their houses for the next few years like there will never be food ever again and we would be shitting ourselves every five seconds. As just like it has done many a time before history has repeated itself, but this time with the dinosaur go go juice that we all put in our cars. So what’s the real issues then I hear you say, nothing, there is none. The only thing mentioned was a shortage of drivers to drive HGV’s carrying our food, fuel and Amazon packages to our shop...

  I’ll start of by saying that you must drive safety and not use excessive speed, be safe people don’t end up hurt or hurting somebody else. I really don’t understand why some people driving totally normal cars, on totally normal roads refuse to go at the speed limit. The amount of people that hold every one up because they can’t use that little peddle on the right hand side and put their foot down! I was driving down a nice clear wide road with the speed limit set at 50 mph, nice long sweeping bends and pleasant sunny weather, all in all a good day to be driving. Then off in the distance I spotted it, a small silver in colour Honda Jazz, here is where it all went from a good drive with not issues to horrible and frustrating! As I mentioned before, the speed limit is 50 mph so it is reasonable to expect that you should be driving at that speed and not that much lower if everything is normal. So say if you’re the Honda Jazz traveling at 40 mph on the same straight road in goo...

I don’t know how many time I have seen this and I’m sorry if this turns in to more of a rant but this gets on my nerves so much, if you can’t park with in the bloody lines then you should not be bloody driving! It seems no matter where I go I will be plagued by those who never developed the primitive skills as a young child, colouring in between the lines. Now a child I could excuse, as they are only a small innocent proto-human without the fine dexterity commanding only a crayon with no risk what so ever to anybody other than the mild peril of treading on a dropped crayon on the floor and its accompanied clean up! But driving a car this is something you do require the skill of keeping it in-between the lines, you are now driving a massive heavy lump of metal which can go at least 70 miles per hour which requires training to use and drive legally. It’s pretty much night and day   Now to my latest run in with those who didn’t manage to pick up the foundations from their youth of...